Dear Written Pieces,
Hope you and your family of nouns, verbs, adjectives, and adverbs are doing well, as well as your extended family of pronouns, prepositions and Interjections!
I’m writing to you today to tell you that I am breaking up with you. I know we have had a long run together….starting from our time in first grade when I had such a crush on you, tracing out the letters of the alphabet that makes you up.
I think of our treasured school years as we grew up together from crafting simple sentences to arranging complex paragraphs.  And the earnest and passionate poetry we would create together late at night, expressing our deep high school infatuations, which we never let anyone else read.
And who can forget our escapade with the thesis in college.  I was sure I would never be able to slog through it, but you supplied the words when I needed them most. And not only did we complete it on time, but we actually graduated too.
But then things turned, during that cold, wintry autumn…..as I decided to write my first novel. You insisted that I write about what we knew; that I should trust the language we normally use, tell a story we were familiar with……write about something that was ours to tell together.
But, no, I strayed, I was bigger than just us. I was going to show the world out there, and you too, Written Pieces, that I could write whatever I wanted to.  And so I wrote an epic,….and epic using big words, superincumbent sentences, obscure phraseology, and arcane allusions…..a veritable panoply of wit, wordplay and repartee…….
Well, we all know where that ended up…………No. 10,789,426 on the Amazon Best Seller List.
So, I’m breaking up with you because right now, I am too proud accept my failure and come crawling back to you. You were right, and I was wrong……a simple statement, but not simple to swallow.
Sincerely yours,
Your Heavy-hearted Paramour
p.s.  Probably after a gallon of Häagen-Dazs ice cream, and a few bottles of wine, I’ll be better,…………so even though I jilted you, my lifetime lover,…please don’t completely abandon me yet……our story has yet to be written……
Publication Date: October 11, 2021
Dive, wade or simply belly flop your way through our world’s unplanned journey in which nerds have been busily (though mostly inadvertently) inheriting the earth, while the rest of us have been lost in our smartphones, glued to our computer/TV screens, or were ordering a pizza and binging on Netflix.
In this terribly humorous account, we discover how the wild rise of nerds, and their mesmerizing technology, have completely redefined society, thereby affecting every facet of our lives including:
- How we interact – OMG, do not call me or stop by, I’ll text you
- How we work – Virtually all the time
- What we eat – Why the snack aisle in the grocery store is the world’s most popular travel destination
- How we dress – Why our sense of fashion has been sadly diagnosed to be in Stage IV
- What news we consume – Look here, I told you I was right
- And speaking of sports – Why national team sports are headed to the penalty box, forever
Explore how our highly stressed lives and natural world are perilously close to a collapse not seen since the Trojans remodeled their public square with a fetching horse. and then discover who may, indeed, be our unexpected saving grace.
Prize is a $25 Starbucks gift card, open to USA.
Nerds Gone Wild
Mister Victor began writing his bio in utero, and plans on working on it until his death.  Born with the name Victor Bjorge, he picked up his pen name when he was interning as an elementary school teacher.  The children in his classroom simply decided that it was much better name for him because it rhymed, and it didn’t involve pesky unexpected arrangements of consonants in his last name.
After teaching, and finishing up college in poli sci and journalism, he has been experiencing a long and chronic career in the technology sector, ground zero for nerds.
Currently, living in New York, he is teaching a master class in writing to his pet hamster, LuÃs, who’s very eager, but has real concentration issues, and is currently being evaluated for ADHD (Attention Deficit Hamster Deportment).
