Publication Date: September 1, 2025
Like many girls growing up in the eighties and nineties, Melissa Fraterrigo leaned on popular culture to transition from childhood to adolescence and beyond. Judy Blume told stories about girls embracing their imperfections; Madonna encouraged bold moves. But Fraterrigo’s experiences with dating and attempts to refashion her body through diet and exercise left her feeling far from empowered. It wasn’t until Fraterrigo became a mother to twin daughters and they began their own self-criticisms that she questioned how she might help them navigate their own girlhoods.
A handsome swim coach’s advances, an anxious daughter soothing her father’s temper, the history of Mace, and the joy of female friendship: these are some of the memories that shape Fraterrigo’s worldview as an adult. Written with lyricism and insight, The Perils of Girlhood provides a reckoning and a reclamation. And while these personal narratives developed from Fraterrigo’s desire to guide her daughters, their universal truths compel us to consider how best to bring all of our daughters into the future.
“This gorgeous, shattering, hopeful, sorrowful, soulful book is about the perils (and glories) of girlhood, yes, but also of motherhood and daughterhood, womanhood, life. I dare anyone to read it without a frequent—maybe constant—shiver of oh yes, me too. Whether Melissa Fraterrigo is writing about the excruciations of adolescence, the highs and lows of love and marriage, self-image, friendship, extreme dieting, or the daily just-below-the-surface drumbeat of worry that’s so often baked into motherhood (not an inclusive list!), she is writing from the heart, beautifully and heartbreakingly and oh-so-smartly.”—Michelle Herman, author of If You Say So
Melissa Fraterrigo became a mother to twin girls, which ignited her protective nature. She must help her own daughters navigate this world, one which, as she reflected, she may have let take advantage of her.
The Perils of Girlhood is a collection of Fratterigo’s memories, which may have been her starting point in determining life lessons to share with her daughters. This will likely prompt any mother reading it to initiate an inner dialogue on which dangers should be discussed with their children. The chapters all feel connected yet independent enough that this could be a reading stretched over a long period, mulling over each essay, without the need to really recall the details from the previous chapter.
Yet, this is no parenting help book. The memoir by Melissa Fraterrigo felt so familiar due to her 1980s cultural references. In her reflection and her vivid description of youthful experiences of the time, I found myself realizing how vulnerable girls were, as the norms of the time dictated that “good” girls should be accommodating. Her memories sparked my memories. The references to music, books, and even crimes were great creative connections that added to the enjoyment of the book. Yet, some essays would introduce two or more concepts before tying them together by the end of the essay, which required patience in reading.
The Perils of Girlhood is Melissa Fraterrigo’s look back at what shaped her in the 1980s and early 1990s. Her words may feel painfully familiar as some experiences and emotions are universally shared by many girls as they move toward womanhood. 
Melissa Fraterrigo is the executive director of the Lafayette Writer’s Studio in Lafayette, Indiana, and teaches at Purdue University. She is the author of the novel Glory Days (Nebraska, 2017) and a collection of short fiction, The Longest Pregnancy: Stories.
